That's good to know -- and it would be a good thing to make sure they know, too, even if it never comes up in exactly this format.
Easy for me to spout advice, of course, when I have no kids of my own. But so many people I know keep secrets from their parents because they're sure the parents wouldn't approve/understand their choices. Maybe they're right, but I often wonder if the parents would be horrified less by the choices than by what their kids assume about them.
It seems so likely to me that they're not so inflexible as they are thinking that these are hard and messy conversations, so they'll wait and cross that bridge if they come to it. And they don't realize what message their silence sent in the meantime, or that their kids came to the bridge years ago, and crossed it alone.
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Date: 2011-03-06 06:56 pm (UTC)Easy for me to spout advice, of course, when I have no kids of my own. But so many people I know keep secrets from their parents because they're sure the parents wouldn't approve/understand their choices. Maybe they're right, but I often wonder if the parents would be horrified less by the choices than by what their kids assume about them.
It seems so likely to me that they're not so inflexible as they are thinking that these are hard and messy conversations, so they'll wait and cross that bridge if they come to it. And they don't realize what message their silence sent in the meantime, or that their kids came to the bridge years ago, and crossed it alone.